Posted on December 14, 2021 in Divorce

It’s always all about your spouse. If you have something you want to do but it isn’t something they approve of, they make you feel terrible about it. They make life about their experiences and make it seem like they’re the best thing that has ever happened to you, even though you feel terrible in your relationship.

If this sounds familiar, you may be getting ready to divorce a narcissist. Divorcing is tough regardless of who you’re leaving, but when you try to leave a narcissist, things could get messy. Here’s what you can do to prepare.

1. Prepare to face irrational actions from your partner

The first thing to do is to prepare to face your partner being irrational. At first, they might fight to get you to stay. They may shower you with gifts and things you’ve wanted to do. That’s all to make you guilty and to get you to stay.

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 Posted on November 11, 2021 in Divorce

Some people make the decision to divorce and act instantly, but many others take time to prepare before they file. It is important to make arrangements to live independently and protect yourself financially when you file for divorce. However, you have to be careful about how you attempt to do so.

The wrong actions could look like misconduct to the courts and possibly undermine your rights in the divorce proceedings. You have to be honest about any property you take, especially if it is community property under Texas law.

How could your financial preparation for divorce lead to accusations of misconduct?

When you don’t disclose your secret escape fund

It is common for people to set aside money so that they can support themselves after a divorce filing. However, the income you used to fund that account or stash is technically a marital asset.

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 Posted on October 20, 2021 in Family Law

Many men feel blindsided when their wives tell them they want a divorce. After all, you promised to spend the rest of your lives together, for better or worse. Realizing that she does not take that commitment as seriously as you do can be a real shock.

Rather than letting denial run the show and continuing to do nothing, there are certain steps that you can take to protect yourself if the end of your marriage is potentially on the horizon.

Listen to what she has to say

Someone asking for divorce will usually give you an explanation as to why. Understanding the logic behind the decision can help you emotionally process this unexpected change. Rather than arguing with her about the idea, you may simply need to hear her out and then consider the issue.

Take time to process

Spontaneous reactions very rarely benefit people facing massive legal changes. Don’t just pack your stuff and leave the same night she brings up the topic. Give yourself time and space to think about things so that you can take the right steps to protect yourself.

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 Posted on October 12, 2021 in Divorce

If you have a spouse who was wealthy prior to your marriage and would like to divorce them, you may find yourself in a unique position. In some ways, divorcing can be beneficial for you. You can leave a relationship that is not working for you. You have the option of fighting for a share of your marital assets, too.

At the same time, divorcing someone who is financially well-off can be difficult. They have the money to take you to court and to use the best attorneys and support that they can afford. You may not be in that same position.

What can you do to level the playing field?

If you’re divorcing someone who has the money to make your life difficult, you should carefully consider if you can negotiate with them to avoid conflict. If you rely on your spouse for an income, it’s equally important to make sure you work out your budget in advance and ask for what you need knowing your limits.

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 Posted on September 14, 2021 in Divorce

Unfortunately, some people find themselves in a situation where they feel that the other parent may leave with their children unexpectedly. They may already have frequent arguments about the custody schedule or be dealing with threats of fleeing or withholding custody.

It’s important for parents to be able to take steps to prevent a parental abduction. One of those possible steps could be to use a tracking app to see where your children are. Can you use it though? Is it legal to do so?

Location devices and your kids

It is pretty typical for kids to have location devices in today’s world. Smartphones and smartwatches have location settings and parental controls that may allow you to track your child’s location if necessary. Of course, this device has to be with them, or else it won’t be any help.

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 Posted on August 20, 2021 in Child Custody

In Texas, there is a standard possession order applying to custody cases. Right now, it is a standard order that 75% of custody will go to one parent while 25% goes to the other. This is an older rule that could be updated to reflect a more modern 50/50 split with the option to adjust it as fitting based on the parents’ situations.

Parents in Texas have been arguing to have the assumed standard possession order changed to 50/50 custody because not doing so is encouraging fighting and litigation. Parents who don’t litigate to make themselves seem like the parent who should get primary custody currently may find that they end up only getting to see their child around 25% of the time.

50/50 shared custody is the goal for many parents

Many parents want to have a 50/50 custody schedule. They also want to make sure that fathers are getting the right amount of time with their children. The attorney general’s office has admitted that only around 8% of custodial parents are men in Texas. Some believe that this places an unfair burden on women because there is an assumption that they will take over a motherly role following a divorce rather than getting equal support from their child’s father.

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 Posted on August 11, 2021 in Divorce

You and your spouse have probably set aside money for years to fund your retirement. Filing for divorce will inevitably impact those retirement savings. Some people have to spend money set aside for retirement to cover the cost of divorce.

Even those who can absorb divorce expenses without tapping into retirement savings will usually have to split retirement accounts and pensions. The community property laws in Texas give each spouse a claim to retirement savings and pension benefits accrued during the marriage.

When you file for divorce close to retirement age, you will want to be proactive about protecting your plan for retirement. Taking the two steps below will help you figure out an estimated budget for your post-divorce retirement.

Learn about your Social Security retirement benefit rights

If you and your spouse both work, you may each have Social Security retirement benefits that you can claim when you get older. However, even in households where both spouses work, it is common for one spouse to learn more or to focus on a career more than the family.

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 Posted on July 13, 2021 in Divorce

It seems like winning is often the top priority for divorcing. Different people may define “winning” in their divorce as securing certain assets or certain terms for the custody of their shared children. However, securing a “win” in either of those areas may require a massive investment of both resources and time.

The more a couple fights over their property and custody terms, the more they end up paying for divorce. These protracted battles can also often do real damage to the relationship between former spouses, which can be problematic if they have to share custody as co-parents later.

More people every year turn to collaborative divorce as a way to truly win at divorce by keeping their costs low and securing the terms that matter the most to them.

How collaborative divorce is different than litigation

In a traditional, litigated divorce, each spouse submits documents to the courts and may provide testimony about their marital circumstances. The judge has to review all of that information and then make determinations based on family circumstances, marital assets and Texas state law.

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 Posted on July 07, 2021 in Divorce

Divorce has different implications at different times in your life. In your 20s or 30s, the biggest concern will probably be negotiating custody arrangements.In your 50s, with retirement looming and your children likely close to adulthood or already out of your home, your concerns will be very different.

There are steps that you can take now to help proactively prepare for a divorce if you are over the age of 50.

Get copies of financial and tax documents

The longer you have remained married, the more marital property you will have. Before you can form a realistic idea about the fairest way to split your property, you first have to look over those assets. Knowing what you acquired and earned during the marriage is very important.

Review your retirement plans

The chances are good that you and your ex planned for a joint retirement based on your savings and shared household expenses. You will likely have to split retirement assets unless you have a pre-existing agreement about how to handle them in a divorce. Looking at what you have can give you an idea of what you need for the future.

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 Posted on June 10, 2021 in Divorce

Prenuptial agreements were once rare, but they have become common in modern marriages. Similarly, postnuptial agreements have also risen to prominence in recent years.

Like prenuptial agreements, postnuptial agreements involve spouses negotiating specific terms and committing them to a contract. However, people often address different issues, as years of marriage can give rise to multiple concerns.

People create postnuptial agreements for many reasons, like saving their marriage or avoiding a messy divorce. The goal may be to pave the way for a faster divorce in the next year or even to prevent divorce. Whatever the goal, there are certain issues that married couples often decide to address in their postnuptial agreements.

Marital misconduct

One of the most frequently-cited reasons people give for creating a postnuptial agreement is concern about their spouse’s behavior. When one spouse develops a drug addiction, empties the savings account while gambling or cheats, the other spouse is in a vulnerable position.

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