Recent Blog Posts
Divorce and your dog (or cat): What you need to know
When you and your spouse get divorced, who gets the dog? What about the cat?
In the past, pets were nothing more than property — and their disposition after a divorce was given no more scrutiny than the fine china and silverware. Today, however, there’s an increasing trend in the courts to recognize that pets are — in many real ways — substitute children for a lot of couples. As such — and as living, breathing beings — it’s important to treat their custody after a divorce as a serious matter.
Since 2017 alone, Alaska, Illinois and California have all passed laws that give family court judges the right to consider the well-being of the family pet when deciding who gets custody — not just the person who bought the animal or paid the vet bills. The end result is that more divorcing couples are ending up with custody agreements — even when they don’t have children. In many cases, shared custody of the dog or cat is deemed the only fair way to handle a situation when both halves of a splitting couple seem to have been equally involved in the animal’s life.
Should you celebrate your divorce with a party?
Human beings have a natural inclination to celebrate. Whether we’re celebrating Christmas, New Year’s Day, a pregnancy, a birthday, a person’s “coming out of the closet,” a retirement, and many more momentous occasions, we love a chance to get together to mark important events and transitions from one part of our lives to another.
So, why shouldn’t you have a party to celebrate your divorce? After all, you had one to celebrate your marriage!
People may argue that a marriage is something worth celebrating because the reception party is designed to acknowledge the couple’s new status as a married duo in front of the entire community. The party is meant to allow friends and family members to wish the new couple well and offer their support, whether through gifts, money or just a willingness to be there when needed.
Is any of that different for a divorce? When you go through a divorce, you naturally hope that the community around you will recognize that you are no longer part of a couple. You’re independent and free again. You probably also hope that your friends and family members will be around to offer their support — especially emotionally as you make your adjustments to your new life.
Common issues that can affect child custody in divorce
If you and your spouse are in the middle of a child custody dispute in San Antonio, it helps if you know what issues could come up. The courts weigh many factors to determine which child custody/parenting/visitation arrangement is in the best interests of your kids. Though you may feel your feelings and personal preferences should be included, in times of divorce, your children’s needs and interests take precedence.
The goal of child custody is to keep parents involved in their kids’ lives without putting children at risk or causing them to suffer from the dissolution of marriage. To achieve this, the judge uses the facts and his or her discretion to determine which custody arrangement is ideal. Here are a few issues that can affect the outcome of a child custody dispute.
Texas judge calls Child Protective Services dishonest, malicious
A Harris County judge sanctioned Child Protective Services (CPS) for actions that deeply disrupted a Texas family’s life and ripped two small children from their loving parents’ home. The judge awarded the family $127,000 plus legal fees for what they’d suffered. He also ordered CPS to retrain its workers.
The saga started when a five-month-old infant fell from a lawn chair and struck his head on the cement. Although his mother immediately sought appropriate medical care for him, doctors spotted a second injury that the mother couldn’t explain. As required by law, they contacted CPS.
Since the baby’s injuries were “consistent with child abuse,” according to the CPS team, both the infant and his two-year-old sister were removed from their home and placed with family members.
It wasn’t long, however, before doctors at Texas Children’s Hospital discovered the real reason for the infant’s wounds: a blood clotting disorder that had been previously undetected.
Is ‘birdnesting’ for you?
So-called “birdnesting” is being touted as a new — and much improved — way of co-parenting after a divorce. Before you try it, however, make sure you realize what you’re doing.
The way it works is that the kids stay in the family home while the divorced or divorcing parents rotate in and out. Whenever it isn’t your turn in the family home with the kids, you stay somewhere else. In most cases, the parents get an apartment for this purpose.
The goal is to minimize the disruptions that children face from divorce. This type of parenting agreement accomplishes that by putting all of the stress of adjusting to weekly changes in living quarters on the adults.
In practice, birdnesting can be very difficult to keep going for long — even for the kids. Experts say that this style of living tends to work best when the concept of divorce is still new to the kids. Seeing their parents rotate in and out of the family home allows them a transition period where they can adjust to the idea that their parents are no longer a team.
Divorces could be more expensive in 2019
The new year is going to bring new tax laws — and that’s likely to make divorce a lot more expensive for some high-earners.
In particular, the changes in the tax code taking place in 2019 affect the way that spousal support is treated for taxation. Under the current law the person paying the alimony is able to deduct it from their taxes. Since that person is typically a high earner with income that vastly exceeded that of their ex-spouse, the deduction is often enough to lower the taxpayer’s overall tax rate. That has often encouraged high earners to be somewhat generous with their alimony agreements.
Under the new law, spousal support is no longer deductible. It has to come out of a payer’s net income rather than the gross. For the roughly 600,000 people already claiming the deduction, the law won’t change how they are required to handle their taxes. They’re given an exception since their support agreements were in place prior to the law’s change.
Want custody of your child? Don’t let your emotions rule you
If you’re in a battle for the custody of your child, it’s perfectly understandable if you’re feeling pretty emotional. Unfortunately, you can’t afford to let your emotions dictate your actions because that could be fatal to your case.
Here are several rules you need to follow that are designed to keep your emotions in check and your custody case on track:
1. Don’t focus on your relationship with your ex
No matter how clearly you see the connection between your ex’s failings as a spouse and your ex’s failings as a parent, keep it to yourself. Otherwise, you’ll sound bitter and vindictive — and you don’t want the judge to think that your custody battle is just an attempt to punish your ex’s bad behavior.
Focus only on your ex’s inability to be a good parent and leave your relationship out of it.
2. Don’t give your ex any warning about your strategy
Nonwhite children face greater governmental scrutiny in Texas
If Child Protective Services (CPS) in Texas ends up at your door on a tip from a relative or neighbor saying that your children are abused or neglected, what are the odds that CPS will remove your children from your home?
It turns out that the answer isn’t the same for everyone. The answer may depend largely on where you live — and the color of your skin.
The Texas Department of Family and Protective Services issued a report that shows a sharp divergence between the way that families of color and white families are treated by the system. Throughout the state, it’s far more probable that African-American and Latino families will be reported for suspected abuse or neglect than Anglo families in the first place. Once CPS becomes involved in a case, nonwhite parents are also far more likely to see their children pulled into foster care than Anglo parents — even when there is substantially less reason to be concerned.
The best interests of the child govern custody issues
Child custody matters following a divorce can put your nerves to the test. As a newly single parent, you want to do your best to help your child adjust to post-divorce life.
You must also work with the other parent, which can be challenging, especially if the divorce was less than amicable. Here are four tips to help you manage custody issues in the best interests of your child.
1. Explain the custody arrangement
To relieve feelings of anxiety, let your son or daughter know what to expect of the custody arrangement. Once the visitation schedule is in place, stick to it. For example, both you and the other parent should adhere to the agreed-upon drop-off and pick-up times. Do not be casual about it, and do not fail to show up when your child expects you to, because this could cause feelings of anxiety or fear.
Supplemental Security Income and child support: What to know
It can be challenging to plan ahead for a child with special needs. One additional challenge faced by divorced parents of a special needs child is how to make sure that child support payments don’t impair the child’s eligibility for Supplemental Security Income (SSI) benefits.
Supplemental Security Income — and the Medicaid entitlement that goes along with it — is a needs-based governmental program for the disabled. As a minor, your disabled child may not be eligible for SSI and Medicaid while your marriage is intact due to the way that a portion of the parent’s income is “deemed” to the child. However, divorce often changes that situation. In many cases, the parent who takes custody of the disabled child is unable to work full time due to the child’s needs. With the other parent no longer in the household, that reduces the child’s deemed income considerably.
However, child support can become an issue. While the child is a minor, child support isn’t considered income paid to the custodial parent but income paid to the child. Supplemental Security Income will exclude one-third of the payment, but the rest is counted against the child’s eligibility for benefits. For a lot of parents and their disabled children, this is a huge burden since it can reduce or eliminate the child’s eligibility for important programs.