Posted on January 30, 2019 in Divorce

Is your first Valentine’s Day following your divorce or separation coming up?

The first “anything” important after a breakup — especially when it’s the end of a marriage, not just a romance — can be rough. However, Valentine’s Day is especially poignant for many people going through a separation or divorce because of its romantic connotations. Anyone who is used to being part of a couple is probably excruciatingly conscious of being alone on that day in particular.

How can you cope with Valentine’s Day stress? Try these tricks:

1. Stay away from your ex

Don’t give in to the temptation to contact your ex via text or social media. You may end up making yourself feel worse. The momentary nostalgia the holiday provokes won’t overcome the realities that led you to the divorce in the first place.

2. Go on a “date” with someone else

You don’t have to find romance to have a good time. You can go out with a group of friends or a best friend — or even your kids. Dress up and celebrate your love of life instead of some romantic notion.

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 Posted on January 24, 2019 in Child Custody

A study from the Centre for Fertility and Health is drawing attention in the medical community because of what it has to say about how divorce affects the chances that a child will suffer from depression.

The study, which was carried out in Norway, looked at the correlation between divorce and the use of antidepressant medication by the children of divorced parents once those children became adults between 20 years of age and 44 years of age. Essentially, the study determined that someone whose parents divorced when they were very young (under the age of 4) were the most likely to need antidepressant medication as they got older. Those who were between the age of 15-19 when their parents divorced were 12 percent less likely to need antidepressants later. Those who were already adults when their parents divorced were 19 percent less likely to need antidepressants in the future.

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 Posted on January 23, 2019 in Firm News

Property division can be a major concern for divorcing couples in Texas. Unfortunately, some attempt to gain an unfair advantage by concealing assets or income to keep a greater share or avoid having to pay spousal support.

Knowing some red flags for deceptive behavior can help you become aware of suspicious activities early on. If this is the case, let your attorney know at once. It is possible to take steps, such as hiring a forensic accountant, to track the missing assets and help you protect your interests.

Blocking access to financial information

It can be fairly normal for one spouse to do the majority of the family’s bookkeeping. However, both should have full access to financial records. Taking steps to prevent you from accessing financial documents, bank records and credit card statements is typically a red flag. A spouse who wants to hide finances may change passwords without telling you or reroute financial correspondence to another address or a P.O. box.

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 Posted on January 16, 2019 in Family Law

The government shutdown of 2018-2019 has left approximately 800,000 federal workers without pay — but that’s just the start of the real human toll that’s being exacted from the budget fight being waged. The families of all of those federal workers are also affected.

What do you do if you are a federal worker who has now missed a paycheck while the government shutdown goes on and you owe child support or spousal support (or both)? You know that it’s uncertain whether or not you’ll eventually see your back pay — and you may have no idea how long it will take since it’s far from automatic.

Here are some tips:

1. Do not try to pay your support on credit. That’s only likely to create a bigger financial disaster in the long run for you — and it isn’t sustainable. You’ll eventually run out of credit.

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 Posted on January 10, 2019 in Divorce

The first Monday following New Year’s Day is a busy day in many attorney offices. That’s the day that a lot of unhappy couples pick up the phone and start the process toward ending their marriages.

Why the rush every January? It has a lot to do with the factors that lead to a divorce in the first place:

• Money troubles — which are often exacerbated by the excesses of holiday spending
• Interpersonal troubles — which can be amplified the more time a couple spends together
• Drinking problems — which can be aggravated by all that holiday “cheer” that’s available
• General disinterest — which can creep up on a couple over time and leave a marriage feeling dry and unfulfilling

It’s estimated that one out of every five couples starts seriously considering divorce during the holidays — but many choose not to act until the holiday season is over. That’s a reasonable reaction, given the cultural emphasis on “family togetherness” that exists during that season. Asking your spouse for a divorce right before Christmas is considered a pretty terrible gesture.

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 Posted on January 04, 2019 in Divorce

Auctioneers say that there are three big “Ds” that send art and other collectibles to the auction block: debt, death and divorce. Could your divorce result in a lifelong collection of art or other valuables being put up for auction?

It depends.

A lot of times, debt and divorce are twin factors in the decision to put a pricey art collection back on the market. If you have a large collection of paintings, statuary, antiques, jewelry, stamps, coins, movie memorabilia or other items that collectors crave, it often makes the most sense to liquidate at least part of that collection in order to have the funds to transition to single life. It may even make sense to get rid of a large (and space-consuming) collection if you intend to move into smaller quarters post-divorce.

However, there are other times when a collection ends up being auctioned off because the parties involved simply aren’t willing to negotiate about the value of that collection. The collection ends up being sold, and the proceeds get divided between the warring couple as a result.

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 Posted on December 27, 2018 in Family Law

The road to “happily ever after” can be full of unexpected twists and turns. That was certainly true for one Michigan couple after they found out that the wife’s Texas divorce was never finalized decades before.

Both halves of the couple appear to have struggled to find true love before meeting on MySpace in 2010. The husband, a father of four, had divorced in 2000. The wife, a mother of five, had divorced her first husband way back in 1993 — or so she thought.

It turns out that the judge who had heard her divorce petition died shortly after. In the aftermath of his death, something happened to the woman’s paperwork and the final divorce decree was never entered into the official record by the Clerk of Courts. People commonly assume that their divorce is legal the moment that the judge signs the decree, but that’s not true until the decree makes it into the official records.

Unaware of the mistake, the woman became an unwitting bigamist when she married her new husband three years after they met. She only found out that her prior divorce wasn’t finalized two years later — which set her on the complicated path of having to settle a divorce that should have been done and over with more than 20 years before. Then, she and her current husband had to appear before a judge in order to have the illegal marriage voided before they remarried. It was the only way to set the entire marital record straight and avoid complications in the future.

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 Posted on December 23, 2018 in Firm News

The prospect of telling your child about your divorce may be scary. It can be a tender and heartbreaking moment for everyone. However, it is a vital discussion to have.

How you tell your kid about the end of your marriage depends on age and maturity. School-age children have enough understanding and experience to understand the basics of what divorce means, but may not be able to process their emotions in a healthy way. Here are some pointers for informing your six to eleven-year-old child about your separation.

Time it right

While there is never a perfect time to talk about divorce, there are certainly wrong times to avoid, such as the following:

• Just as your kid is heading to an extracurricular activity
• Right before you leave for work
• Right before bedtime

You do not want to give your child news that makes him or her feel alone and unsafe. Choose a time with plenty of opportunities to give reassurances and hugs afterward.

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 Posted on December 20, 2018 in Child Custody

In a perfect world, parents who are divorcing will all put aside their differences with each other when it comes to figuring out what is best for the children and only go to battle when they really can’t agree.

In reality, some parents use their children as pawns in a high-stakes game of revenge against their spouse. If you believe your spouse is going to engage in an all-out war over custody, you need to watch for the following dirty tricks:

1. Games of distraction

What’s the best way to throw you for an emotional loop and get you riled up right before court? Any type of attack that threatens your financial stability will usually do it. Your spouse might:

• Empty the joint bank account and create overdrafts
• Burn through all the credit cards
• Make a false claim of domestic violence and have you arrested or, at a minimum, barred from the house

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 Posted on December 14, 2018 in Family Law

The Harris County division of Child Protective Services (CPS) in Texas is appealing a fine of $127,000. A judge levied the fine after he determined that the agency acted in a way that was both malicious and deceitful when removing a young child from his home. The agency then lied to the court to prevent his return even after it was clear that he was not the victim of abuse.

We recently discussed this case in our blog as an example of how CPS workers are sometimes inexplicably motivated to exert their authority over parents and families — to the exclusion of right or reason.

The agency initially removed two small children from their parents’ care after one was suspected of being abused. Medical professionals quickly determined that the child was actually the victim of a medical disorder — but the agency barreled ahead with their restrictions on the family. Workers then purposefully hid the medical evidence in the case from the judge.

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