There’s a saying that, “when one door closes, another opens.” However, for someone going through a divorce, it usually feels like all the doors are slamming shut at once.
Divorce can destroy any sense of calmness or peace that you have — and it’s easy to get angry or even bitter. Unfortunately, anger and bitterness can also lead you to mistakes. Here are some important ones to avoid:
- Don’t try to interpret everything you read on the internet. There are thousands of articles out there about divorce — but each case is unique. There’s no online guideline to your divorce. By the same token, don’t listen to your relatives over your attorney, either. None of their experiences with divorce are exactly the same as yours.
- Don’t trust your divorce case to the first attorney whose name you see. Do your research and make sure that the attorney you choose is the right one for you.
- Don’t lie to your attorney. If you lie to your attorney and hide income, assets or an affair, it is likely to hurt you. No matter how awful you feel about your secrets, your attorney isn’t your judge. He or she is your best advocate — but if you don’t give the attorney all the information to do his or her job, you’ll get less-than-great representation.
- Don’t be unreasonable. Divorces aren’t pleasant but they don’t have to be tremendously ugly, either. They get that way when one or both spouses goes into the situation with expectations that aren’t realistic: they demand full custody, more than half of the family assets and more support than is fair.
While divorce is a painful process, couples who decide in advance that they’re not going to make these mistakes will find the road ahead of them less uncertain.
Source: Forbes, “Alleviate Divorce Pain By Avoiding These 7 Common Mistakes,” Michael F Kay, Jan. 09, 2018